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P-Vock's Music Box: Time to Suffer

Hello and welcome back to P-Vock's Music. My friends, something I did not believe would happen for a long time has just happened. Kingdom Hearts 4 is real and looks to (hopefully) release within a reasonable timeframe. I am so excited about this. So to celebrate how happy I am, let's show some music that accompanies pure suffering.

Kingdom Hearts is no stranger to super bosses, and every single one of them is exceptionally challenging. Whether it's Sephiroth, a hooded dude with lightsabers, or an anime edgelord, you're going to get your ass stomped multiple times over before you finally triumph against these foes. Luckily for the player, you have soul-crushingly epic music to accompany the grind. Let's start with one of the most iconic super boss themes.

If you're feeling up to it, Kingdom Hearts 2 features one of the most infamously challenging fights of all time. After KH1 has the iconic villain of Final Fantasy VII make a cameo to stomp your ass, KH2 one-upped that with... An empty suit of armour (and also a Sephiroth fight for good measure). That is it. You're not fighting some world-ending demon or an angry boomer with a god complex, you're fighting an empty suit of armour that is pissed off. The music is sure to remind you of that.

It just sounds so sad. Like, this is an absolutely outstandingly epic fight theme, but it is also incredibly sad. Why is this armour so damn angry at you? Well, I'm not going into the stupidly layered reasons because no one else cares. Nevertheless, Rage Awakened is an iconic theme for an iconically hard fight that would not be topped for over a decade.

Kingdom Hearts 3, after a somewhat contested launch, released DLC in 2020 that really taught people what true pain is. And once again, we are accompanied by incredibly somber music that remains epic and intense all the while as you fight a regular-looking emo teenager.

"You thought you'd win?" "I don't lose." "Nice try." These are just some of the deflating taunts Yozora throws at the player after thoroughly stomping their ass multiple times over. This prick steals your healing items, steals your weapon, and steals your will to go on. It is fitting that the music feels quite hopeless, as though this is something you just can't do. You know it's bad when the developers literally create a cutscene to play after you give up that gives some hints as to what happens in the cutscene that plays after you finally kick his ass, simply because they felt bad for the tons of people that would simply be unable to beat the boss. But I did it though.

However you're spending this coming long weekend, I hope it is full of joy and triumph, as opposed to the somber, soul-crushing, devastation these boss fights often create in the player. Thanks for checking this out, and I'll see you next time with another suggestion from my Music Box. Stay Brutal!

PS. have a little more hopeful boss fight theme that also accompanies a small teenager absolutely kicking your ass (that happens to be my favourite fight theme in the series)

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