P-Vock's Music Box: Feisty Football

Hello and welcome back to P-Vock's Music Box. Friends, let me tell you, I am THRIVING right now. I just got the announcement of one of my dream games. A game I truly believed would never exist. A long-dormant series is coming back. A series I've written about on BRD before to whine about how badly I wish it would come back. A game I had given up hope on ever coming back. But oh boy, I am so glad to be wrong. So please, to celebrate the new game, let me introduce you to the edgiest Mario game ever.


Many people in my redneck-fused neck of the woods do not care for soccer. It's rather slow, uninteresting, and players are notorious for diving. It's not my favourite sport, but I do enjoy it quite a bit. While RPGs are my favourite genre by a long margin, I would definitely classify arcade sports titles as my second favourite. So leave to Super Mario, of all franchises, to really showcase how hype soccer/football can truly be. I'd play the opening music alone, but no, you NEED to see the full intro movie for Mario Strikers Charged because it defies logic.

I'll bet you did not expect to see Mario characters get electrocuted by a fence in what is essentially a damn blood sport when you got up today. Everything about this trailer, and the game as a whole, is outlandish for the series from which happy and bouncy series Mario's lovable cast of idiots hail. It just stands out so hard in the best way possible. Not to mention the absolutely hype music that accompanies this truly bizarre intro.


The best part of this game's music is that each character has their own theme. I could write an entire blog post about each theme and how incredible it is. But for now, I'll just give you one for The boy. I will give you the theme of the sexiest character in all of video games.

Just imagine being taunted by this mustachioed menace after he scores on you while this certified banger plays in the background. It's a powerful image that has stuck with me since this game was released well over a decade ago. The melody and instruments combine to create this weird mix of epic scale and pure, raw, uncut sexual prowess. I think that is the perfect way to describe Luigi. If Luigi wasn't already my favourite character in the Mario series, seeing him thriving on the pitch with this pitch-perfect ballad absolutely gave him the title.


It's always a warm and fuzzy feeling when you get something you've always wanted but believed would never come to be. The announcement of Mario Strikers Battle League has given me exactly that feeling and I could not be happier. I hope your weekend leaves you feeling as great as I do right now. Thanks as always for checking out this dumb series, and I'll catch you right back here next week with another suggestion from my Music Box. Stay Brutal!


P.S. I can't leave you with only one theme, so here's the music that plays during Sudden Death overtime in a match. It's the same music as the opening, and it still absolutely slaps!


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