Merlin’s Mewsings Vol. 3

Hello again. You should know me by now, this is the third time I have talked to you. I am a cat, but I do have some friends that aren’t. Like Alison, that person who does everything for me. I am worried about her, she may be my servant but I still consider her to be a friend. I am worried about her because she is behaving irrationally. She seems to be losing her mind because she has stopped doing something that I believe is very stupid. I will explain this to you the best that I can. Alison has stopped lighting paper sticks filled with leaves on fire, and deeply breathing in the resulting smoke. I have never understood why she was choosing to do this. It makes no sense. It is a very logical idea to me that smoke, being a byproduct of fire which is something to fear and run the other direction from, is something that also should be avoided.

The paper leaf sticks also don’t smell very good when they have been lit on fire, and seem to permeate everything nearby. Luckily for me, she stopped doing this indoors when I moved in as a kitten. However, I still have witnessed this bizarre behaviour by her from a safe distance. I really would rather not go near her when she has one of those things lit. It’s so dangerous! I mean, what if she drops it and everything catches fire? Then I will have nowhere to live, and I like it here. People don’t seem to think of these consequences to their actions, but luckily for me, Alison hasn’t had any of the paper leaf sticks to light on fire for several days now. As a result of this, however, I have become worried about her.

Now that she is not breathing in all of that smoke, she smells better and will probably stop coughing, but she seems to be distressed without the paper leaf sticks. She’s complaining more, and irritated easily. She gets even more upset than she used to when I lay on that fun clicking board in front of the computer, it causes the computer to make all kinds of interesting noises and I like how the screen flashes and then turns black. She really doesn’t like it when I do that though, and speaks that word I really hate, but don’t understand, “NO”.

Anyway, I don’t know why she misses the paper leaf sticks. I hear they are very expensive, and she doesn’t seem to realize that they are not essential to her sanity. But without them, she seems to be a different person. I don’t understand these silly habits of people. But I know she will get better, once she comes to her senses and realizes that smoke and fire are not good for her, or for me or for anyone. Now it’s time for me to see what I can wreck around here, like I said, I have been working on the computer. I think that it’s time to vault myself off and on of that chair with the wheels in front of the computer. The material feels great when I sink my claws and teeth into it. Until next time. - MERLIN

Check out more from Merlin: https://www.brutalrealitydigest.com/post/merlin-s-mewsings

and

https://www.brutalrealitydigest.com/post/merlin-s-mewsings-vol-2